The topless double standard

I recently found out about the existence of a non-profit organization in the United States called GoTopless.  This group fights for the right of women to be in the nude from the waist up the same as men.  Sure, the group was originally started by a UFO cult (the Raelian Movement), but apparently people of all stripes have joined this cause.   Putting any hormone-driven comments and wolf whistles aside, I must say that I have pondered their chain of reasoning myself.

I can understand anything from the waist down being covered up due to the clear sexual connotations.  Also, I realize that breasts have a sexual connotation in Western society, but one must wonder why.  They serve no reproductive function (as far as conception goes, anyway). 
Maybe the reason breasts are considered such a taboo is because they have consistently been hidden for millennia.  Any National Geographic special focusing on a tribe in the Amazon or African jungle where wearing little to no clothing is commonplace makes it clear that a woman’s breasts are not considered “naughty” as in Western culture.  In fact, if toplessness were normal here, I doubt as many guys would be laughing, hooting and hollering, or other such shenanigans. 

Anatomically, it doesn’t make sense why that particular portion of the anatomy should be any more obscene on a female than the same part on a male.  Both males and females have mammary glands.  In fact, men occasionally have lactated when put on hormonal treatments for cancer.

The only difference between the two chests lies in the fact that a man’s mammary glands generally do not develop.  Due to the different levels of the hormones testosterone and estrogen between men’s and women’s bodies,  a man attains more muscle mass and less in the way of fatty deposits in his pectoral region, whereas the opposite is more natural for women.  In fact, the answer to the age-old question of why men have nipples lies in the fact that female is the default gender for a human embryo.  Human biology, folks… when your mother is a nurse, you realize that putting anything into medical terminology makes it sound unappealing.

Anyway, to get back on subject, despite these biological similarities a man won’t possibly get charged with disorderly conduct or indecent exposure for walking around shirtless (even if it is, as in my case, incredibly unappealing).  It’s an excellent way to cool off on a hot day, and a way to show off to everyone (if you have anything to show off).  Tropical tribes rarely wear shirts because it’s impractical in a climate with that kind of heat and humidity. 

However, almost 100 years after the suffrage movement, women still face legal consequences for this action.  A handful of places in Canada and the United States have laws allowing topless rights for all, but the majority of the country does not.  Did you know that several U.S. courts have defended mooning as a practice of free speech?  Yet not all of us can conveniently cool off in the summer (I’ll just wear a t-shirt, I’m self-conscious).

I say this from a purely rationalistic and scientific standpoint, and am trying to avoid being classified as a “horndog,” or whatever the kids are calling it these days.  How about some final food for thought?  There was a time when clothes did not exist.  We were too busy trying to knock rocks together to survive.  The painters of the Renaissance saw the human form as beautiful and natural.  And for the more conservative of us… Adam and Eve would have been naked.  So who knows?  Those are just some thoughts of mine.  Things will stay the same, most likely, but perhaps there is a more casual future in store (especially with climate change)?
Wow, it is possible to write a halfway mature article about breasts!  I’m surprised.